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    師門(潼陽中學杯)

    發布于:2018-11-25 10:01  ┊ 閱讀  ┊  人參與  ┊ 文 / 張嘉儀

      1

      成都的天氣是有些怪脾氣的,一個禮拜里有四五天都沮喪著臉,十面霾伏,出行大概是不相宜的。比這更糟的,是今年的秋天還沒來得及粉墨登場,冬季的號角便匆匆吹響了。

      進入十一月以來,望江校區林蔭道兩旁的楓樹憔悴而凋敝。楓葉在冷風中瑟瑟翻飛,漫天飛舞,漸而飄落歸根,堆成一地金黃。

      從研究生院出來,漫步在弘毅路上,腳下不時發出窸窸窣窣的脆響,那是零落的生命發出告別的聲音,不卑不亢,應循自然的輪回。

      往前走是一個十字路口,對面坐落著一片年代久遠的住宅區,叫竹林村。這里的竹林已然徒有其名了,布滿了雜貨店、飯館、小攤,竹子卻不多見。我的導師,便居住在這僻靜幽深的竹林村。

      我與毛迅先生的第一次見面,是在這竹林村的一個陰雨天。

      2

      毛迅先生,何許人也?

      剛來川大報到時,全然沒有聽說過文新學院有這位老師。在填報導師意愿時,我選擇的是去年七月參加夏令營面試時認識的一位聲望很大的老師,并且在畢業前夕寫過一封自薦信。我以為,成為這位老師門下的學生,幾乎是板上釘釘的事情了。沒有想到報到時領取的檔案袋里,我的導師一欄竟是一個陌生的名字,心中不免生出一絲悲涼。料想,大概是因為面試時那糟糕的表現吧。繼而又阿Q式的自我安慰,既來之,則安之,上天自有安排,倒也欣然接受了這出人意表的結果。

      毛迅先生約我在竹林村見面,是在給他發短信的第二天早上。電話中,他解釋道,因為忙于其它,所以干脆選擇方便的時候用電話交流。我那一宿懸著的心終于落定。他的聲音是溫和可親的。

      按照先生在電話中的安排,我聯系了其余三位同門。因為不熟地形,幾經輾轉才到達指定地點。令我驚訝的是,隔著人流和雨霧,先生遠遠地向我們揮手示意,并且叫出了我的名字。

      那次見面結成的情誼,像一塊方糖放入咖啡,香濃馥郁,化不開了。

      先生在一家臺灣風味飯店接待我們。那三個女生是很健談的,大家逐一介紹了自己的情況,和先生親切地交談著。當然,我事先做了功課,上網了解了先生的大致情況。最感興趣的話題,莫過于先生“七七級川大中文系四才子”之名聲了。

      先生向我們講起了這個名號的由來始末。七七年恢復高考,塵封的大學之門重新打開。那個時候的大學生可謂鳳毛麟角,天之驕子。而中文系,更是令人心馳神往的所在。先生能在校園流傳的“川大四才子”兩個版本中居其首位,自然有過人之處。除了學識超人,還多才多藝,吹拉彈唱,樣樣都會。所以能在人才濟濟的大學有如此聲名。

      聽了先生追憶年輕時的大學故事,我們不由得贊嘆連連,仿佛自已也回到了那個屬于七七級絕代風華的黃金時代。

      先生今年剛好五十九歲,考慮到身體狀況,原本已不打算招生了。所以先生的信息沒有公布在今年的研究生導師名單中。作為外校學生報考時,自然無從知曉。后來先生改變主意決定再帶一屆學生,我們自然幸運地成為了他的關門弟子。

      先生頗有雅興地向我們介紹成都的風俗人情。我雖是四川人,常年在外求學,對成都并不熟悉,所以同樣充滿新鮮感,就像少年時代的魯迅聽著閏土的故事,在深墻大院里打開了新的眼界。以后在大家都有空的時候,先生會開車帶我們去成都周邊游玩。之所以選擇招收四個學生,是方便乘坐他的小車。上一屆是五個學生,出去游玩坐車就麻煩了一些。之所以選擇向招生處要來一個男生,是為了保護女生的安全,他一個人力量單薄了些,擔心給不軌之徒可乘之機。先生如此細心周到,體貼學生,讓我們笑逐顏開,一掃行程的疲倦和初來的生疏。

      先生告誡我們,不能被師兄師姐“帶壞”。逢年過節花錢給他買禮物,是不合適的,發短信問候一下就可以了。我們是學生,花的是父母的錢。以后他會經常帶我們出去吃飯,交流思想近況,都不允許我們花錢。先生說,我們就是他的孩子,這是他應該做的。況且花這點錢,對他來說也是輕輕松松的事。

      先生的好就像蜜餞一樣涂在我們的頭上。那綿綿陰雨,阻擋不了歡快的暖流氤氳在飯店上空。

      就在我們被這豐饒的幸福感包裹的時候,先生卻話鋒一轉,無不感嘆地說,做他的學生,也有不好的影響。到了這個年齡,沒有了什么功利心,看淡了很多東西,幾年前就主動卸下了中文系主任的職位,現在是學校二級教授,放棄了繼續“晉升”的機會。他希望我們在這三年時間里過得自由、快樂而充實。根據自己的興趣愛好和發展前景選擇怎樣走下去。他說,不會向其他老師那樣急于讓學生發表論文評優拿獎,希望我們聽從內心的聲音,作出價值判斷和人生選擇,收獲完滿的生活。如果踏實做學問,有了好的論文成果,他會加以指導幫助發表,而且第一作者是學生本人,他只以筆名作為第二作者。

      先生的話,如一場細雨,潤物無聲,卻復蘇一個春天;似一陣清風,在這喧嘩世界里,久久拂蕩在雅靜古樸的竹林村。

      3

      先生這學期開設了一門選修課,叫《現當代文學理論》。

      按照常理,講授內容應該是國內現當代文藝思潮及理論。先生卻另辟蹊徑,在第一節導論課上旗幟鮮明地指出,既然中國現當代文學理論引自西方,那么我們就應該直接閱讀西方元典,學習西方文藝思想,這樣才能真正學有所獲。同時先生強調,作為一名現當代文學專業研究生,一定要有當下意識,進入當下文化語境,不能經院化、象牙塔化、書齋化地玩學術。先生的一席話高屋建瓴,讓我獲益良多。

      導論課之后,先生要求學生自由選擇某一理論流派進行研讀,并做課堂成果展示,然后他就課堂情況作穿插補充。作為先生門下學生,我要率先開講。從同門師兄師姐那里了解到,這是先生這門課一個不成文的規定。

      國慶后的一周,我就要上臺講課了。在研究生課堂上做足足三個半小時的演講,對于我來說,這算是一個不小的挑戰。先生告訴我,萬事開頭難,但也不要有任何心理負擔。他讓我請教上一屆的師兄,遇到棘手的問題也可以當面和他交流。這是一顆定心丸,讓我有了很大的底氣,期待有一個出色的表現,不讓先生失望。

      國慶期間,我沒有太多的心情去放松,更多的時間投入到了查閱文獻資料和制作課件中。然后一次次增刪內容,調整格式,并且做了兩次試講。最終胸有成竹的走上講臺,順利完成了課堂成果展示,得到了先生和同學們的肯定和掌聲。在匯報過程中,多虧有了先生不失時機畫龍點睛式的補充點評,才讓我得以收放自如,同時也增添了幾多歡暢的氣氛。

      有了我的沖鋒陷陣,后面的同學表現逐漸步入正軌,精彩連連。現在想起,這門課最大的亮點,莫過于先生不時穿插在課堂中的麻辣點評。

      先生的語言透露出錢鐘書式的學者幽默與睿智。有時遇到某個艱深晦澀的理論,先生往往信手拈來一些簡單的生活事例。或加以佐證,令人茅塞頓開,或予以反駁,令其原形畢露。比如講到俄國形式主義中什克洛夫斯基的陌生化理論,先生借題發揮,侃侃而談。由作為一種文學手段的“陌生化”引申論及現代人一種普遍的生活方式。譬如電視節目的改版、女性服飾的改良、體育競技的魅力,乃至國家政策的變動。先生常常從一個文學理論出,展開對世界人生的討論,金句頻出,思想的火花時時閃爍。

      先生偶爾也會使用一些四川方言插科打諢,像一支奇兵,出其不意,闖入普通話的城池中,攻城略地,占領語言的高峰。“沖殼子”(吹牛)、“扯筋”(賴皮)、“背時”(不走運)、“稱展”(容貌姣好,衣著得體)、“鼓斗”(強行、強制)、“怪眉日眼”(長相奇怪)等等俚詞俗語不時脫口而出,學生竟也能根據語境知其大意,同時伴隨著銀鈴般的笑聲。

      先生對中國古代文藝理論如數家珍,常常引出古代文論類比西方,啟發我們進行對比分析。比如講到龐德的意象派詩論,先生舉出了《詩藪》中“古詩之妙,專求意象”、《二十四詩品》中“意象欲出,造化已奇”等古代文論觀點,引導我們對中西詩學中“意象”內涵的探討。在論及形式主義的理論缺陷時,先生引用《論語》中“文質彬彬”、《左傳》中“言之無文,行而不遠”的說法,一針見血,直擊要害。

      桃李不言,下自成蹊。先生的授課風格受到了同學們的熱捧,有不少文學愛好者、語文老師專程前來旁聽,這大概是先生所沒有想到的吧!

      4

      上午十一點半,準時下課,先生從不拖堂。

      授課結束,叮囑我留下來陪他到學校外面的飯館吃飯。起初,我有些拘謹和顧慮,時間久了,倒也習以為常了。

      先生是丁克家庭,和太太沒有養育子女,他把門下學生當作自己的孩子。我問他會有孤獨感嗎?先生說目前看來,和正常家庭是沒有兩樣的。他的思想境界總是超前的,顯得有些“異端”的意味了。就像十幾年前寫的幾本書,到現在也沒有通過審查付梓出版。對此,他付之一笑。或許,一個思想先鋒者,多半是孤獨而高貴地活著。

      先生的文學課每周只有一次,我覺得應該珍惜這樣一個和先生交談相處的機會。下課后,我會留下來關掉教學電腦、投影儀和電燈,然后和先生穿過楓葉盡染的弘毅路,談笑風生地下館子。在一次談話中,先生告訴了我導師被換的“真相”。

      原來,我是被先生從之前選擇的那位老師那里“挖”過來的。倒不是我多優秀(單看面試成績,我幾乎是墊底了),而是男生在文新學院實在是稀有物種。僅拿現當代文學專業來說,二十多名同學只有三個男生。再加之我是四川人,所以得到了先生的厚愛。后來聽說,那位老師是在最后確定名單的一刻才決定拱手相送的,開學不久還托他的學生送給我三本專著。

      這人世間的情誼,往往就是陰差陽錯,機緣巧合而已。聽罷先生的話,我們相視一笑。

      和先生一起吃飯聊天,我們習慣使用方言。好像這樣一來,才能把話說透、說細、說得更有味兒。我們聊哲學,比如唯心主義、神秘主義、死亡意識;談文學,比如魯迅、張愛玲、李劼人;講愛情婚姻觀念,甚而家常里短,雞毛蒜皮。

      有一回,我小心翼翼把自己寫的一首新詩拿出來向先生請教。當時靈感是夜里不具名的思念漸漸上癮,陷入某種迷狂狀態,由此我以罌粟花為意象完成寫作。先生看罷,對詩中的文字感覺和創作想法給予了肯定,同時指出罌粟既可止痛療傷,又能把人推向死亡的深淵。如果能由個人日常情緒推及到世俗人們產生的一種普遍的情感體驗,揭示現代人基于迷狂情緒帶來的生存困境,那就要下些功夫了。甚至可以由此上升到生命哲學的層面,那就更需努力了。然后先生從具體的寫作層面提出了很多有益的看法,并且談到自己以前寫作詩歌的經驗。

      有時興起聊得投入,先生久久沒有動筷子,餐盤中剩下些許沒動過的菜,他便夾到我的碗里,說多吃幾塊肉,別浪費了。這樣的細節,讓那些待人接物的禮儀顯得多么可笑,人性的真善往往被繁文縟節消弭殆盡了。先生吶,到底是一個多么可愛又可敬的人!

      先生說,等他完全退休以后就潛心讀幾本書,研究一些未被學界重視卻卓有成就的作家,權作茶余飯后的一點雅興。有一回送先生回公寓的路上,他特意提到陳寅恪先生。好奇為什么陳先生在晚年身體抱恙的艱難處境下嘔心瀝血,堅持寫成《柳如是別傳》?這背后到底有怎樣的初衷呢?這引起了先生濃厚的興趣,囑托我試著找到這一套書。

      這件事我一直記在心里,花費了些精力才買到。而郵寄到手中,又過了十余天了。

      昨天和先生吃飯的時候,我把這套書交到他的手中。先生托著書,開口說道:“好多錢?我給你嘛?”我極力推托,說書本就是文人相贈之物,就當作送給先生的一份心意。先生眉頭一皺,道:“那啷個要得嘛,下次我送你一份禮物。”見我碗中一空,又道,“老板兒,添一碗飯。”

      飯畢送先生到竹林村公寓。在回來的路上,一隅偏僻的角落里,生出幾叢勁拔蒼翠的細竹,在小攤吆喝聲、汽車喇叭聲、路人匆匆的腳步聲中,一副紋絲不動、闃然自修的風姿。而遠處,漫天的楓葉在颯颯寒風中翻飛、旋轉、升騰、墜落,似乎訴說著什么……

      

    責任編輯:胡俊月 作者文集 作者聲明
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