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  • 親,歡迎來到忽然花開! 登錄注冊忘記密碼
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    瑣憶(潼陽中學杯)

    發布于:2019-03-06 10:20  ┊ 閱讀  ┊  人參與  ┊ 文 / 謝鵬斌

      歲月如梭,年華錯落,時光擱淺漫長的往事,或喜或悲,一個人努力,總算跌跌撞撞走完了前半段30歲的年月。望著照片中日漸開始變老的自己,用力的合起雙眼去想起曾經,突然之間似乎又陷入冗長的夢境!那些逝去的青春時光,似乎像頑皮的小孩一樣,悄悄地踮起腳尖,伏在我的耳邊輕輕的問我:流年逝去,你學會了什么?

      ‌又是一個安靜的夜晚,下了一夜雨,下了一夜的往昔與未眠,聽著雨滴在擊打窗欞和外面的樹葉,雨滴中嘩嘩作響,同時也敲打著我未眠的內心,思緒又把我帶回了從前的點滴歲月。

      我出生在一個地道的農民家庭,父母都是老實巴交的莊稼人,對這樣的家庭而言,萬般皆下品,惟有讀書高,讀書是他們孩子唯一的出路,我和弟弟從小就被父母以及周圍的人灌輸了這樣的思想,所以雖然天分不高,但是皆很努力。我高中是在離家有十幾里山路的一所中學度過的,學生都是來自附近幾個鄉鎮的農家子弟,除了本鎮附近的,大都在外面租房住,自己做飯,每周六的下午就可以回家了,度過了六天饑腸轆轆的日子,(因為自己做飯吃不好也吃不飽),下課零聲一響,我們都像土匪一樣的像校外跑去,跑到住處,帶上已經收拾好的東西,騎上破舊的飛鴿自行車,飛一般的向家的方向沖去,經過一路的顛簸,灰頭土臉的我終于到家了,到家門口,喊一聲媽,正在廚房做飯的她會一邊親昵的答應一邊快步走出廚房,帶著一身的油煙味走到我面前,替我佛去身上的塵土,滿眼都是疼愛,每周六無論我回家多晚,她都會等我回去了再一起吃飯,吃飯時,會坐在我的旁邊,笑著問我一些學校的事情,我悶頭吃飯,有一句沒一句的回應著。她會疼愛的撫摸著我的頭,就好像我能快點長大似乎。

      第二天,媽媽會花一天的時間幫我準備下一周的伙食,面,油,蒸好的饅頭,因為周末下午我就得回校。記得有一次周末下午下雨路滑,我就只能周一等早上回校,為了趕上早上的課,我就得早上五點多天麻麻亮起床,帶上媽媽準備的伙食和零用錢,推著自行車,一步一步向村外走去,媽媽打著手電筒,在后面為我照路,深秋的早晨,露水很深,也有絲絲寒意,我叫媽媽回去,但是她執意要站在村口路邊給我照路,我騎車走了好遠還能看到她的手電筒在搖動,他怕我一個人害怕,直到我轉過拐腳處看不到。她才會回去。回校的路上,由于天還沒有亮,一個人還是有點怕,所以大聲唱歌就是唯一消除恐懼感的方式,一路上陰暗的大山飛速的在我身后褪去,但我隱約覺得媽媽一直在我身后用手電筒照這我,直到我看到鎮上的燈光,才如釋重負。

      現在想起媽媽以前為自己的點點滴滴付出,,眼角會不由的濕潤,自己并沒有如媽媽所愿那樣的好好努力,以至于求學過程頗為周折,中途幾次想要放棄,但都想到媽媽當初站在村口為我照明的手電筒,我就告誡自己,為了媽媽當初那樣的執著我都應該堅持,媽媽當初的執著換來今天的我,至少有了一份可以養家糊口的工作,雖然不會大富大貴,但至少不會像他們一輩那樣的每天面朝黃土背朝天難忘的辛苦。

      如今每次我和她回家,媽媽還是和以前我讀書時一樣的出門來迎我們,雖然很大程度上是基于兒媳婦在的的緣故,但我還是從中會找到她以前的影子,唯一不同的就是媽媽腳步沒有以前那樣的敏捷,精力也大不如前,但每次我們回家,似乎都是她最快樂的日子,為我們準備這,準備那,我沒有阻擋,因為她在做她自己認為最快樂的事情。

      如今,許多曾經認為的理所當然,現在開始慢慢的都變得那么的刻骨銘心,時光荏苒,有些面容漸漸模糊,有些聲音漸漸消失,有些人情冷暖漸漸散場,有些回憶漸漸遠去。但是,高中時期那個深秋的早晨,以及媽媽站在村口執著的身影和那束不停搖動的手電筒,這份記憶,永遠不會褪色,這份曾經認為理所當然的人情,永遠還不完!也永遠無法償還!

    責任編輯:胡俊月 作者文集 作者聲明
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